The Mayo Incident

This is for Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop. A nice little blog, go over there and check it out.

The prompt:
Write about something mean you did to a sibling growing up.

Well, I was actually the baby of the family, I have two older sisters so I never really got to do much of anything mean to them. Not to mention that I really don't like confrontation and causing bad mojo so I try to stay on the down low.

My sisters, on the other hand, used to torture the shit out of me when I was little. This is the record of one such incident.

I used to love yogurt. It was one of my favorite treats, never mind that it was pretty healthy (compared to some of the other crap I like. :) My favorite kind is the fruit-at-the-bottom kind. Peach, strawberry, blueberry, banana, pineapple, and so on - I love almost all of the flavors.

Well, one day I went rooting through the 'fridge looking for something to munch on. I spied with my wandering eye a yogurt cup on the 'fridge door and decided 'Hey! Munchy!' When I picked up the cup, I noticed that the lid to it was loose... that should have been a warning sign... but I'm naive. Go figure. I thought that someone had opened it to eat it and then decided not to. Yes. Naive.

That little voice inside my head said 'It's a trap!'
I stabbed that voice with a Q-tip.

I spooned a nice big heap of 'yogurt' into my mouth and then something strange happened. My autonomic nervous functions failed for what felt like an eternity. Let me explain... I was expecting a delightfully yogurty-fruity taste explosion... what I got was the horrible taste of mayonaisse. Or to more accurately describe it... 'the flavor of a thousand rotting kitten corpses'. I've never been a big fan of mayo. I only like it in chicken or shrimp salad, and that's it. Mayonaisse in its pure, unadulterated form is the antithesis of everything holy in the world.

That moment, that eternity, became a world of pure revulsion.
I shit you not.

A second later, I spit out that awful mass and gagged and gagged and gagged. Now, I don't remember (unfortunately) if either of my sisters were there. I seem to remember hysterical laughter - but there's been so many times where I've endured their hysterical laughter that its all blurred together to me now. I could have just imagined it, but I don't think so. Nor do I know which of my sisters actually pulled that prank.

There's actually been quite a few different 'incidents'. From the Red Hots Incident to waking me up early on a Saturday morning telling me, "You're late for school!" The horrors, I tell you, the horrors!

But it's ok though, baby brother got them back many times over now. :) My inane ramblings drive them crazy - just how I like it - and I don't plan to ever stop.


Five Favorite Things

An assignment from Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop:

List your five most recent favorite things.

In no particular order, here we go.

Chinese Art

It's quickly becoming my lifeblood. I find that I get 'fevers' if you will where I need to paint. Almost like a madness, the desire to express and create.


Mmmm, Tea... ...and Numi makes some excellent tea.

Left 4 Dead

Zombie killing at its best! This game is great! Get three friends to join in and survive through four different boards of zombie apocalypse OR get seven friends to play together and have zombies versus humans matches! Fun for the whole family!


So much weird crap and storylines that twist about and around on themselves. It's a dizzying array of entertainment and one of my favorite shows.


Bad ass, I tell you! There are a ton of good stories and animations out there in the anime world. The image above is one such anime called Hellsing.


Writer's Workshop

Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop? I'm taking the 'write' out of Writer's Workshop and replacing it with 'paint'. :) Pictures speak louder than words on this one, though I think the photos don't do them justice - still getting used to this new Olympus camera. (Yeah, I suck at photography.)

Describe a talent you have - Chinese Brush Painting.

The following paintings are currently mounted on drawing board as they dry during the backing process.

Bamboo and Leaves Mounted
Bamboo and Leaves.

Shuen paper with a rice paper backing. Painted in ink.

Gallery One
Gallery One.

This is a reproduction I did of a painting by my teacher, Jiang Zhe Zhou. I used watercolor and ink. Once again it's shuen paper with a rice paper backing.

Bamboo in Moonlight
Bamboo in Moonlight.

I experimented with paint droplets and a lack of ink to create a moon effect. The bamboo is in ink and paint. This is Japanese rice paper backed on more Japanese rice paper.


The Dream Cycle, 2009.1

Defending The House Against Zombies

I was in a 3-story house with a few other people. The house was relatively modern, but had no power and the windows were boarded up. For whatever reason, zombies were on a rampage outside and we were trying to stay quiet and undetected. The zombies were of the fast 28 Days Later style.

At some point, some zombies started bashing on the front door of the house - near where where I was. One actually punched a hole in the door and I could see its rotting face growling and looking inside. So I pulled out a pistol I had and shot it in the face. With that one dying, the other zombies went nuts and starting ripping the faceless one apart and eating it. Yes, the zombies even eat their own.

The door began to crack and splinter as I fired off a few more shots at the zombies. We retreated to the second floor and then the third floor to make our last stand against the zombies. And then I woke up...

'cause I felt like I was being watched.